Monday, August 23, 2010

Contrary to Popular Belief.....

YOU do not know me. You know one side of the story and feel that is enough to judge me. It’s not but I understand that your desire to do so is human nature. This is my attempt to set the record straight for all of you who have illusions of who I am and make assumptions on the life I live.

Contrary to popular belief….

• I did not marry I man that I barely know.

• I did not choose some guy over what’s best for my children.

• I choose to bring another person in to their lives who will simply love them.

• NO ONE is losing my children.

• I am not a bad mother, a heartless parent or out to hurt, destroy or attack. I am living my life.

• I am not callous and cold-hearted when it involves my children and their dad.

• Staying in Maine for ones whole life can lead to closed minds and narrow points of view and that evidence is becoming clearer and clearer.

• Loving my boys is not determined, measured or validated by the state we live in.

• Allowing my children to have new experiences might be emotionally hard but it is not cruel.

• My silence is a reflection of my desire to do the right thing not my inability to defend myself and the choices I make.

• I know that it hurts like hell and I know because it hurts me, too.

• They ARE still children and will adjust better than anyone wants to admit.

• Regardless of how they feel about moving, my children know that their dad and I both love them very much.

• If I was leaving and they were staying, they would be saying they want to go.

• You use words like “resent” to offer comfort it and it makes me realize how lost your morals are that you actually hope for those things.

• I could counter-act each attack that is made but I realize there is no benefit in that. Some people will only consider what they believe to be true. Other people’s opinions aren’t valuable enough to even bother with. Still others have no way of thinking for themselves and merely jump on with whatever everyone else is thinking. Regardless, there is no point in dealing with any of those.

• Adjectives cannot be measured. Words like “Great”, “Happy” and “Mean” are a matter of perspective and are not standardized ways of determining and measuring success or failure.

• Sometimes you can fixate on one side of a coin so long that you forget there is another side.

• Flaws do not ruin something beautiful unless you look at it and only see the flaws. While you might be in that situation, rest assured my children are not.

• My children have been raised with the strong and solid knowledge that they are loved deeply and completely by their family. Aren’t they lucky that family is a bit bigger now and there are more people to love them?

• I DO want what’s best for my children. It’s just my idea of best is different from yours.

• I DO get along with their father. Yes, we disagree at times but we DO get along. Even through all this, we have not fought. Great for our boys but real irony for you, don’t you think?

• They will do great. They were, after all, raised that way.

Now really, isn’t there somewhere else you can focus your energy since you seem so gifted in snap decisions and protesting? Solve world hunger, cure diabetes or end the war and bring our soldiers home? Seems kind of unfair that you are spending all your time focusing on fixing me when there are so many bigger issues in the world that you could meddle in.

Thanks.